Keeping it Zen


The last thirty-six hours have not been fun for LGBTQIA folk such as myself. It’s middling unfun for me personally since not as much of the nonsense was specifically directed at my part of the spectrum, buuuuuuuuut it hardly matters how it impacts me when it impacts several million people living here in the USA. However, I must say seeing a brief filed by DOJ saying that equal rights protections under Title VII don’t apply to me because I am in that spectrum was a gut punch. It’s like we’re fighting the same old fights again, and personally, I’m tired of it. I know it’s much worse for trans folk, since much more spleen from His Occupancy of the Oval Office was vented directly at them, but all the same Title VII is quite a bit to have go away in one brief. I hope the courts disagree.

It’s been easy to go from one end of the mood pendulum to the other, just waiting to see what that buffoon will do next. It’s easy to lash out at other folk in the Community as well as Allies. They know it’s bad, and their attempts at protest, humorous or serious, can be misunderstood or misconstrued, and attempts to correct them can make a gulf between the Community and Allies open up as they tire of us lecturing them on our newest no-no list. Hell, I tire of it, too, because I can hardly keep up with what the more Social Justice Warrior types among those I know in the community (and out of it for that matter) are going to decide is the offensive faux-pas of the week. I got to the point where I was over-reacting in all directions, and that was before the most recent load of nonsense.

So I stepped back. Trying to see both the forest and the trees, instead of lost in too much big picture or too much niggling details. Trying not to burn bridges or add fuel to the fires burning all over. Asked The Boss to help me find the words that would chill the situation the hell down before we all give ourselves coronaries.

Hekate is great at that – communicating I mean. She’s our Lady of the Crossroads, places where boundaries touch and people meet. As goddess of liminal spaces, She’s a natural for helping us build the bridges we need to cross from one space to another, and to open minds and hearts. Hekate’s a realm-crossing badass who doesn’t allow Her followers the luxury of excuses or self-deceptions, so we also have to work on our communication as part of opening doors with the Keys that She provides. So I dug deep when I saw situations escalating and people who should realize they are on the same side starting to succumb to the Occupant’s efforts to divide us. And I found my right words. I found the love. I found the humor. I found the way to teach both sides simultaneously and re-open the door.

We need to leave our egos out of the equation. Part of the Dark Night of the Soul within the Fool’s Journey in the tarot is The Tower. It’s the card of ego-death, where all the layers of what we think we are get cracked open so the Light of Truth can fill us. It’s a rough process. It’s painful. Slaughtering our personal sacred cows and using them as barbecue always is. But it’s so necessary. Turning to The Boss when the Tower is part of my life has helped me get through it. She doesn’t take shit from us, and She won’t let us accept our own hype. Hekate’s a tough-love goddess to be sure. But She takes you to that point where all you have left is who you are for real, and when you get there, finding the Zen and sharing it with others becomes that much easier.



Back to Work

Today was one of putting on the shit-kicking boots and getting back to business. In the span of a few hours, while I watched my patient sleep, I put together our Temple newsletter, added more classes to the Hekataion classrooms, helped some Sisters get registered in the Hekataion or recover their login information, and communicated with a candidate for the Korybantes Path. (More on that later.)

I’m really unsure what inspired this burst of productive energy, especially seeing as how the kitten woke me up at midnight and again at 5:30am, so I started my day grumpy and foggy-headed. Nevertheless, I got a burst of creativity about 9am that lasted me through to the afternoon, and much was accomplished. I felt like an active, busy Priestess for the first time in months, and I’d forgotten how good it feels.

The Korybantes Path, as mentioned above, is a new thing within the Temple. Taking its name from the attendant priests of Hekate on Samothrake, it seeks to re-establish an order of male priests dedicated to Hekate’s service. The Boss has been nudging me for over a year to get this off the ground, and some foundational work was laid in February/March, but it didn’t take off. Today felt like an auspicious day to give it another go, and this time I rapidly got results. After some time spent talking with him, the first prospective candidate for the Path had received his assignment to start preparation for his dedication in February.

I enjoy the work of a Priestess with a functioning Temple to keep on an even keel. It truly does suit me. With school starting in four weeks, I’m giving this a running start, with the hopes that by the time my classes start, things will be humming along nicely.


Tonight my son and I got to meet the young man I reached out to a few days ago. From the blue, he messaged me an invite to meet at a local coffee house. Connection made!

He’s fun, silly, gentle, and humble. He and my son hit it off, and all I needed to do was sit back, listen, and drink my coffee. But he wasn’t content with that. Unlike many men – regardless of age – he noticed I was listening far more than talking and reached out to bring me into the conversation. It was a novel experience and one that endeared him to me.

We talked coffee, tarot, music, cats, and many other things. My son gained a friend who he regards as a peer. I’ve found a possible musical collaborator on a project that will be an offshoot of Verses in the Key of H. Magick happened slowly, subtly, but also definitely in about two hours. All without anyone having to be anything other than what they were.

All the while The Boss was smiling and chuckling. She loves it when a plan comes together.

Weaving the Web

Part of being a Priestess is fostering connections, especially in a community that can be as marginalized as ours. My work for Hekate today was mostly about just reaching out.

I recently met through social media a young man who lives very close to me, but whom I’ve not met face-to-face. He looked to be about my son’s age, and the one thing my son doesn’t have is male friends in the area of similar spiritual bent. He has a female friend, and one he’s known since he was going into second grade, who follows a similar spiritual path, but he’s felt the lack of a male friend in the Pagan community of his age group.

So I reached out to this young man, who was older than he appeared, but not so old that my son wouldn’t be enthused about making his acquaintance should it happen. We had a great conversation about many things, and got to know one another as neighbors (it’s a small town, technically we’re all neighbors) and as members of our small subculture.

I tend to feel very awkward making first contacts with people I truly don’t know, which is why it’s something The Boss tends to throw in my path as part of the work. It was my pleasure, though, to talk music and life in general with this young man and both feel for a moment an awareness of the fact that neither of us is the only Pagan in our tiny town. I invited him to our Temple’s tarot tea in September, and I hope I see him there. At least he knows that the welcome mat is always out.